Latest Update

Well, I don't know how long (or coherent) this post will be, but I will do my best! I will take you through it by days, I think that will be easier. MONDAY

• My dad called and said that Nonie is not doing well. They had called them at home at 1am and told them to get to the hospital. When they got there, they were told that her lungs were full of fluid and that the best way to get it out is a vent. However, her lungs are so bad that if they put her on a vent, she will NEVER come off. Nonie has a living will so that was not an option. They decided to try some meds to see if it could be controlled that way.
• He was having Mark (his youngest brother) fly into Bham and asked if Kev and I could go pick him up. I called Kevin, he threw some stuff in a bag, packed up the pups and I took of 30 mins early (to beat the traffic) and drove home, picked him and the girls up and we drove to the airport to get Mark.
• We got to the hospital in time for the 8pm visitation. Nonie was not doing well AT ALL. She was very agitated and was calling for her mother (who died when my dad was a kid)

TUESDAY

• We got up and went to the hospital for the 10am visitation. By this point, Hobie (my Dad's older brother) was here after driving up from Ft. Lauderdale. They went in at 10 and said that Nonie was resting a little better and that the fluid was almost all cleared out. At this point, they said that they didn't know what would happen. It is a waiting game.
• We continue with the visitations at 12p and 2p and then just before the 4p visitation, the Dr. tells us that the Carbon Dioxide is not leaving her body because she doesn't have the strength to push it out. The only way to get rid of it, is to do a Vent, we already knew that we weren't going to do this. He says that she will probably not make it through the night, but definitely not through tomorrow.
• Dr. stated that she is sleeping because she can't wake up (kinda like a coma, but not one) and that eventually, she will just pass away because of the build up of CO2 in her system. At this point, she hasn't opened her eyes all day.
• Dr. does tell us that he had a conversation with her the night before and she told him that she was ready to go, but that she was worried about all of us.
• At the 4pm visitation, I decided that I wanted to go see her (I had not gone up until this point because I didn't want to see her like that. If something happened, I didn't want my last memory of her to be like that).
• I go in to see her and hold her hand and I said "Hey Nonie, it is Lauren" at this point she opens her eyes and looks at me and smiles. I told her that I was very proud of her for fighting so hard and that I loved her and that I knew that she was tired. I told her that we will all miss her but that we will be fine. I told her to go ahead, when she is ready and to go. I kissed her head and hand and left.
• The priest and a nun come in and do Last Rites and we all turn it over to God, to do what is best.
• We decided that since there will be a lot of sitting and waiting and who knows when she will actually go, that Kev and I would go back to Bham and they will keep us updated by phone. I was supposed to be in Decatur this weekend anyway and had already taken Friday off, so I would just come back up then.

WEDNESDAY

• Nonie makes it through the night.
• I was back at work. It was actually a pretty good thing because it kept my mind off of what was going on.
• Around lunch, the Dr. says that he wants to try something else to help make her more comfortable, because she is really struggling to breathe. They put her on BPAP (I don't know what it stands for, but it is like CPAP but somehow different). This helps in her breathing and she doesn't struggle for breath like she was. They said that it might help rid her body of CO2, but we won't know if it is working until tomorrow.
• She still doesn't wake up, but she is sleeping peacefully.
• Nonie (being the fighter that she is) makes it through the day.

THURSDAY

• As of this AM (around 7) her CO2 levels are the same, no better, no worse.
• We are still in a holding pattern, if she does make it through (by some miracle) it will only be a matter of time because who knows what kind of damage her organs have sustained from the high CO2 levels. Also, they recently found evidence of the cancer in her abdominal area so the chances of her long term survival are 0(she can't handle any more chemo) so it is just a time game.
• So, here we are, just waiting, not knowing.

I am going home tomorrow, recital is this weekend, which I am supposed to be dancing in. Who knows though. If she is still hanging on, I will dance, if not, I won't. We will see I guess.

I will say it again, ALL prayers are greatly appreciated. I know it sounds bad, but I just don't want all the suffering for her! If it is His will that she make it through this, pray that that happen soon and if not, pray for her passing in a peaceful manner. We just don't want her suffering any more. Thanks for all the words of encouragement guys! I can't express to you how much it means to me!

Ciao!